And so the summer begins this week…with one anxious, stressed autistic girl.  The things that have been routine for the whole year will come to an abrupt halt.  The bus will not arrive at 7:50 am every morning to pick her up, and drop her off at 3:50 every afternoon.  She will not be on a tight schedule from 8:30 am until 3:30 pm- down to the 1/2 hour or more.  She will not know her expectations at home on a daily basis, until I set them.  The constant asking, wanting and needing food will begin to stress me out beyond belief.

Last night was the first of many nights that she was awake, on and off, all night.  She even managed to ask what day was her last day of school at 3:00 am, which led me to realize that was what this whole thing was about.  As I write this, I am getting her eating schedule ready, and her daily list together.  Each morning, every summer since she was 5 years old, we have made a daily schedule together.  It helps her know what to expect for that day.  Even though it’s not the same as school–it’s a close second.  Not only does it help her, but it helps me in more ways that you can ever know.  If we don’t have it…she is right next to my side  every waking moment of the day asking… “what are we doing now mom?”, “when is dinner mom?”, “what can we do now mom?”.   A schedule at least gives me a few moments in the day- where she knows what she should be doing.  Does she always do it?  No.  (At least she has something to look at and know there isn’t anything huge planned for that day)  Does she have more meltdowns in the summer?  YOU BET.  Do I have more meltdowns in the summer?  Yep. 🙂  However, my meltdowns are more based on the fact that I might need to take out a small loan to pay for a babysitter, and to buy the amount of groceries I will need to feed these 2 children for the summer.

So, today will be my last day of full freedom, as I get her schedule together, and her life (and mine) organized for the next 3 months.  

I think I better call my doctor, so I can double up on MY prozac…and my prilosec.

Look out summer…here we come!