Ok, so this post is not going to sugar coat this thing called autism.  It’s not going to sugar coat having a teenager (which most of us are perfectly aware of).  The combination of the two seem to be causing somewhat of a problem at our house.  My perfectly complacent little girl has turned in to a defiant little (big) shit.  She has always been really good at mimicking others.  This means she hears things and can spew them right back at you, and in the right tone and context.  (For the most part)  She can say, “DUH!”, when it’s appropriate.  She can laugh when something is funny, and silly. Most of the time I think she does these things because she knows the correct response, other times she has learned them.  She has had social skills groups, and speech and language therapy since she was about 5 years old.  She also watches television and hears things around her.  I realize she says things also to get a reaction out of me, and others.  (which works perfectly)   For years and years, she has said things to get a reaction.  She doesn’t care whether her attention seeking behavior is positive or negative.  It is just that…attention seeking.  I give her a lot of freedoms, but when I want her to do something she flat out refuses.  It’s a genuine battle to get her to do it.   There is no filter in this person.  This child.  This autism.  This teenager.  She thinks the thoughts- and says them, and does them.  No filter.

I’m only human.  I’m her mother, but can only be insulted so much and then I have had it.  Being called, “a piece of crap”, “dumb-ass”, “asshole”,  and various other things wears me out.  I pick my battles, but this one is a big no-no.  I run a tight ship at my house.  Autism will NOT be the reason she uses 1/2 a bottle of shampoo during every shower, needs to wear 8 outfits a day, clean herself after using the bathroom, or take care of the dreaded monthly cycle.  (don’t get me started)     On the other hand, being a teenager will NOT be the reason she can say what she wants, do what she wants, not clean her room, pick up her clothes, and be a complete BITCH in this house.  She has a 5 step program at school…and SOON she will at home too.  Her favorite things will be earned.  No exceptions.

I’m done being called names, and being bullied by the autism/teenager in this house.  She will do well with the new program because it’s essential.  I need some semblance of a life.  And, so does she.