Our house understands Phoebe’s autism. We understand about her impairments, delays, anxieties, food issues, meds, teeth issues, and many other things. I live with these daily, and sometimes I forget I even handle these. It’s routine for me, and I add it in to my daily life. I accept these things even when difficult.

Another thing that I have found, is that Phoebe understands a lot of her disability. She knows she’s different than other adults who are 25. She knows she can’t drive, go to college, hold down a job, or date. She knows she needs adults to help her and there are times she uses this to her advantage, but we work hard on independence. She uses language and makes us think she can do a lot more. She can say so many things that sound like a typical young adult, but what she understands is questionable. Phoebe even tries to add in to conversations, but usually it’s not appropriate or related. I understand her epic meltdowns even though they are the most difficult thing ever. I have learned this part of her autism. My family sees it and understands it. Not everyone does. She will talk to nearly anyone when we are out in public, but often times we get strange looks. It’s disheartening. We are always looking to find her friends and outings where she is accepted.

That brings me to a community of adults with disabilities. Phoebe has many friends with a variety of impairments. Phoebe goes to a daycare for special needs, and has many friends with disabilities. Phoebe attends a local camp for adults with disabilities, and absolutely loves it. She is definitely in her element. I have watched as she loves to be with people who are most like her. Last week, Phoebe was in the Special Olympics. She has been going for years, and she is truly the QUEEN of the games. She knows and talks to everyone (and they know her). I had the pleasure of taking her to the “A Night to Shine” prom a few months back (Tim Tebow’s event) and I witnessed this myself. She truly loves her friends and it was so nice to see her have a good time, and be spoiled by this local/national night. I wasn’t even allowed to sit near her. She wanted me far away from her so she could have her fun. All of the people who run these organizations and companies understand the idea of acceptance. They get that everyone just wants friends and fun. We need more of this.

During this month of Autism Awareness, I’d like to thank these places. Thank you for accepting my girl for all her differences. Thank you for guiding her, laughing with her, making her accountable, and even taking her on weekends, and daily outings. Thank you to my family for accepting it. It hasn’t been easy.

I can’t expect everyone to get it, but you all sure do.